In 1 Samuel 20, Jonathan confronts a dilemma. David, his best friend, comes to him and wants to know, “Why is your dad trying to kill me?” Consider the awkward position this puts Jonathan in. He either has to believe that his dad is plotting his best friend’s murder, or he has to believe that his best friend is paranoid (or lying outright). He protests that surely his dad wouldn’t do any such thing without telling him, but David insists.
Now, this is the kind of thing that breaks up a friendship, or at least becomes a topic we never speak about, a “dead spot” in the friendship where we can’t share what we’re thinking…but not for these guys. They don’t stop talking to each other, and they don’t just “agree to disagree” and never speak of it again, either. I’ll let you read it for yourself, but here’s what I want you to notice: David does not indignantly demand that Jonathan just take his word for it. Jonathan does not minimize David’s assessment and insist that he come to the feast anyway.
They’re both men of conviction; neither one backs down, and neither one tries to bully the other into backing down. Instead, they take each other seriously, make room for each other, and pursue the truth together. They agree on a valid way to test the claim, and God gives them an unambiguous result.
If we’re going to walk closely with one another as family—the “these are My mother and My brothers” sort of family—then we have to find ways to do this. Relationships predicated on agreeing all the time last about 15 minutes on a good day. But if we can make room for each other, hold the space for disagreement while we seek the truth together, then we can walk a long, long way together.
All the way to the New Jerusalem, in fact.
Full Contact Christianity 